Surprising Who You Meet In Hell
by Hate being abducted by aliens
Summary: After a heated argument, Mulder and Scully find themselves in a living hell, not literally, thankfully. This story is about self-indulgence, drowning sorrows and somehow, reaching salvation after all. Set during "One Son".
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: **This first chapter is set during that argument in "One Son" between Mulder and Scully. So, it mixes my lines with the ones from the real episode.

Every word, every line, every chapter is dedicated to my Beta "mermaid", Lauren (XFoxMuldersGirlX). Thank you so much for your support, patience, for sharing your great ideas with me, and for actually lending yourself to a character in this story. You're inspiring, to say the least! Above all things, thanks for being this amazing friend! Love you, girl!

**Disclaimer:** Blah blah blah...I do not own anything, just my twisted mind.

I hope you all enjoy reading this story as much as I'm loving to write it!

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><p><strong><span>Chapter 1<span>**

Scully was with Byers and Langly, checking some data over at the computer while Frohike unlocked all of the eight locks from "The Lone Gunmen's Sacred Office" to open the door for Mulder. Paranoia was definitely, and would forever be their trademark.

She heard him arrive, though she kept looking apprehensively at the computer, given the importance of the subject.

She knew that besides Mulder, the Lone Gunmen were the only ones that she could trust and ask for help, if needed, specially when Mulder was in trouble, which surprisingly happened to be almost all the time. She came to them with the only purpose of investigating Diana Fowley, even though she already knew that Mulder wouldn't appreciate the conversation subject. The fact was that Diana was a question mark to Scully, a real mystery. She had never heard about her and then one cursed day she suddenly stepped into their lives, and started to interfere a little more than she should. Scully had heard about Mulder's and Diana's past relationship, though she hardly knew anything about her and, for all of Scully's misery, Mulder seemed to trust her blindly.

"I'll ask you to hear me out before you launch any objections. Mulder, I asked them to pull up everything they could on Diana Fowley". After one minute preparing herself, she finally started her speech, requesting politely nothing less than a few minutes of his attention.

"I don't have time for this". He didn't even seem interested in hearing her out. He was actually impolite and rude, automatically discarding anything that she was about to say. Scully was convinced that she had finally tamed Mulder's stubborn ways, maybe not exactly tamed but she had found a way of handling them, though since Diana had returned to his life, all her six years of work were thrown into the trash.

"Mulder, she's playing you for a fool". Since he wouldn't make things easier, maybe it was just better to simply say the truth, clear and out loud, no matter the consequences. After six years of working together, honesty shouldn't be an issue.

"I know her, Scully. You don't". Just like she was expecting that would be, he was defensive. She hated the fact that he could be just as protective with Diana as he was with her. It seemed that Diana had his trust at the same level as Scully, even though Scully was the one who had actually stood by his side all those years past. She couldn't deny the fact that she was feeling a little jealous, though the worst feeling was to realize that Mulder didn't prioritize her as much as she thought he would or as much as she thought she deserved. Even after such a long time, even after proving her loyalty to him over and over again, she still had to make a huge effort to make him just listen to her and rely on her words.

"You knew her. You don't anymore. I think we can prove that to you". He wasn't willing to listen to her, much less to believe her. Mulder's naivety really annoyed Scully sometimes, specially when that naivety put his life in danger. Perhaps the Gunmen's explanation would add some credibility to her point.

"She took a position in the FBI's foreign counter-terrorism unit in 1991. Seven years in Europe". Byers started.

"Yet there isn't a single piece of information available on her activities in the FBI files". Scully added.

"I hope you've got something more than that to indict her with". He said giving her an extremely annoying sarcastic gasp, the kind that seems to give birth to a sudden killer desire. Now he was definitely getting on her nerves.

She didn't even bother to say "Yes, As a matter of fact I do.", she just answered with another piece of collected evidence, trying to sound as credible as possible.

"Travel records pulled from airline manifests that had been purged from her FBI records. Extensive movement throughout Western Europe. Almost weekly trips to and from Tunisia". She said firmly.

"For the purpose of what?" He asked, showing perhaps the first signs of interest in the subject. Her hopes were instantly revived.

"That's what we couldn't figure until we took a flyer and we found this". Langly answered.

"Mutual UFO network logs". Frohike said. The greatest thing about the Gunmen was that they really were a team, in every possible meaning of the word, spontaneously each one of them contributed a part of the explanation.

"MUFON". Mulder already knew the meaning.

"Special Agent Diana Fowley of the FBI was visiting every European chapter collecting data on female abductees". Scully continued.

"So she's collecting data. Big deal". His disdain suddenly murdered all her remaining hopes.

"Or hiding it". She was determined to dig deeper into the subject until she found her answers. She wouldn't give up easily, no matter how badly her hopes were beaten. She had a point to be proven, or at least heard.

"Scully, you're reaching". He was not only reluctant to listen to them, now he was actually accusing her of manufacturing the facts. That was unacceptable to her.

"Mulder, when I was abducted a chip was put in my neck. Then I happened upon a MUFON group filled with women who'd had the same experience". She said raising her voice.

"So you're suggesting that Diana is monitoring these abductees? Monitoring these tests?" He asked also raising his voice.

"You tell me that Cassandra Spender is the critical test subject - the one who could prove everything. And yet, who is watching over her? Mulder, I can prove what you're saying or I can disprove it but not when Diana Fowley is keeping us from even seeing her. Mulder, ask yourself why there is no information whatsoever on Special Agent Diana Fowley. Why she would suddenly happen into your life when you are closer than ever to the truth. I mean, you... you ask me to trust no one and yet you trust her on simple faith". She said almost yelling at him, with her eyes piercing his.

"Because you've given me no reason here to do otherwise". From all things that he could chose to say, that was probably the worst. All the hard work that the Gunmen and she put in, he simply tossed it in the trash. He seemed to choose to ignore each piece of evidence that was shown to him.

There was a long pause between all of them, a dead silence amongst the killer thoughts. The Gunmen just glanced at each other.

"Well, then I can't help you anymore". She couldn't take anymore, the whole situation was nearly humiliating.

"Scully, you're making this personal". He said, his attempt offending her even more. Though, he was right. That was doubtlessly personal.

"Because it is personal, Mulder. Because without the FBI, personal interest is all that I have. And if you take that away then there is no reason for me to continue". She paused for a few seconds. He just stared at her.

"Mulder, I was abducted, I got cancer, I was the one who was given a death sentence, not you". She said pointing to herself, walking towards him.

"And..and most of all, Mulder, I was the one who stood by your side these past 6 years". She said weakening her voice, perhaps with a bit of affection.

"Still, all of this isn't enough, right? Because at the end of the day you'll choose whatever you want to believe or whoever you want to trust". She couldn't no longer hide her disappointment.

"And I'm tired. I'm tired of running around in circles with you, going nowhere. I'm tired of having to almost beg you to listen to me, to trust me. You just keep taking things away from me, but you never give me anything in return. I don't see the point in me standing here anymore, and apparently, you don't see it either". Now, not only her disappointment, but also her sadness couldn't be repressed anymore.

"Scully! You're overreacting!" Without any sympathy, he said raising his voice again, treating her as if she was the one that was having a breakdown.

"Yes, I am. I always overreact, right? I'm...I'm this constant pain in your ass, and do you know why? Because I always tell you the truth, whether you like it or not. But honestly, Mulder, you don't like the truth". There was rage in her voice.

"No, Scully! You don't tell me the truth! Your only joy is to simply prove that I'm wrong, you probably have multiple orgasms every time you think that yours scientific evidence discredited my belief in the supernatural". He yelled at her too. The Gunmen were probably shocked enough to remain silent.

She was hurt.

"Fair enough, Mulder. Live with as many lies as you want, I'll stop disturbing you for good".

Without leaving any space for further discussions , she started to walk quickly past him, with heavy foot steps towards the door. Even with her heart shattered into a million pieces, she was decided to not look back.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note: **Thank you for the reviews! So...here's the 2nd Chapter.

Lauren girl, it's your turn now! You have a whole scene with Scully! How cool is that?

**Chapter 2**

Scully angrily stepped out of the Gunmen's office onto the dark and cold street, though the cold and the darkness weren't disturbing her at all, they would probably would have if she could actually feel them. She could feel nothing.

She couldn't even cry, all the hate and the anger were repressing her tears. There's an interesting thing about hate, it is able to deceive all other feelings, even sadness. It numbs us, running toxically through our veins and brain, poisoning our thoughts and actions until we can no longer feel or see anything else. It creates not only a different psychological and emotional environment inside of ourselves it's also a physiological metamorphosis, the heart starts to beat faster, there's an unbearable pressure on the chest or it seems that there's something stuck in the throat, smothering us, our muscles tighten up, sometimes it can also be followed by a terrible stomach ache. It's like being in love, though on the contrary, maybe that's the very reason why love and hate are always so directly connected. Some people seem to actually dedicate their lives to hatred, paving the way for diseases and inevitably, to a premature death. Hate is nothing more nothing less than a poison that we drink wishing that the other one will die, it's a powerful and dangerous feeling.

She kept walking blindly down the sidewalk, without any particular direction in mind, and most importantly, without looking back. It was about 11pm on a cold Thursday night, there weren't many people on the street, everything seemed to be surprisingly quiet, only the sound of her stilettos hitting violently against the ground, echoing in the silent darkness. She should probably make her way home, that would be her regular procedure, though she couldn't think straight, control her thoughts or define her next set of actions, hatred was in control of her system.

She heard a cell phone ringing urgently, it seemed very far away until she actually realized that it was coming from her blazer pocket. Never slowing her pace, she took out her phone and noticed that it was Mulder calling her. She already knew that he would try to make her change her mind, like he always did, maybe even try using untrue apologies, or create a wholly different situation to make her feel guilty and apologise instead. She couldn't allow that, not anymore. All her thoughts concerning their argument were screaming inside her head, as a uninvited flashback, and still taken by the hate and anger, she aggressively threw the phone against the solid ground, causing it to crash into pieces. She could feel the curious eyes from a couple that was passing her by, their disapproving stares, even though she didn't care. She kept walking.

She was about two blocks away from the Gunmen's office when she saw something that captured her attention. She instantly slowed down her footsteps.

She could see a rectangular board with glowing red lights. She had to get a little nearer to finally understand what was written on it: "Hades". She knew the meaning, which grabbed her attention even more. Hades, in Greek mythology, was the god of the underworld or of the world of the dead. The board only indicated the name, there wasn't anything or anyone that could tell what the mysterious place was, which only increased her interest, but she could guess that it should probably be a bar or a nightclub. The front door was a little narrow, and seemed to give way to a very dark corridor, with a few low lights on the ground. The hate she felt moments before was simply replaced by curiosity. So now she could deviate her attention to something else, perhaps less harmful. She stopped right in front of the door, hesitating for a few seconds, when she finally said to herself: "Since my life is already a living hell, why not?". Then she took her first footstep inside the dark corridor. She felt a little bit of fear, though her curiosity was wholly in control by now. She thought to herself: _"Let's just hope that this isn't a whorehouse",_ and kept walking slowly.

It was quite a long corridor, and she could already see something that looked like a door, and there seemed to have lights on the other side of it, which would probably be the place. Curiously, everything was still extremely quiet, no sound of people talking, not even some music.

She dared to open the door, and for her surprise, it was a room completely made of mirrors, from floor to ceiling. There wasn't anything or anyone in the room, just a big black imposing chandelier right in the centre of the ceiling, with bright white lamps, illuminating the whole room. As she walked into the room, Scully found that to have her image reflected all over the place wasn't exactly pleasant, it was actually a little scary. She also could see that there was another black door, positioned exactly on the opposite side to the other one that she had just walked in. Since she had already gotten that far, there wasn't any reasons for turning back. She turned the doorknob.

Now she could finally see the bar downstairs. There were two sets of staircases, that would give way to the place. They were vintage black marble. She took the stairs on her right side. The lights were low, though she could see that the walls and ground were completely red. The architecture actually mixed vintage and modern details, to create a perfectly designed room. The place wasn't huge, and as she walked down the stairs, she could see that there were several people scattered around, though it wasn't crowded. There were also two bar counters, both made of mirrored glass too. There was a small stage, with a DJ playing something rock like, but Scully didn't recognize it. Everyone seemed to be relatively young, all dressed in black. She looked to the ceiling and there was a painting similar to the sky, blue with white clouds. The place gave her many different sensations and since she decided to step into this world, she had decided that she, also, was going to enjoy being in it.

She could feel some people staring at her, probably due to her professional outfit, she was dressed completely in black, which seemed to be the standard colour of clothing in the place. Scully was wearing a skirt to her knees and a shirt, both fitting her silhouette perfectly, black pantyhose with black patent leather high heels, which were a little higher than her usual and a blazer that now was starting to make her feel uncomfortable given the heat in the place. Even though her outfit didn't seem to match the place and the people, Scully was gorgeous and inevitably attracted lustful looks, to her surprise, from both sexes.

It seemed a great idea to head to one of the bar counters, the one that was closest to where she was. There were a few people leaning on it, talking and drinking. There were two bartenders and one redheaded barmaid on the counter, who automatically sparked Scully's attention due to the similarity of their hair coloring. She took off her blazer, resting it at her lap, as she sat in one of the red acrylic stools. The ginger barmaid who seemed to be bored, noticed Scully and walked towards her. She was probably in her twenties, about 24 or 25 years old, her hair was tied up in a ponytail with a perfectly done quiff, like some pinup girl from the fifties. She was wearing both dark make-up and outfit, but at the same time and contrasting with her look, she had a beautiful and delicate face which could be compared to a gorgeous porcelain doll.

"Hey, you don't come here very often, do you?" She sounded surprisingly nice. Just like her delicate face, her voice also didn't match with the darkness of her surroundings and neither did her approach. Scully also noticed that the girl wasn't American given the lovely British accent that she seemed to be in possession of.

"Uh...no, it's quite obvious, isn't it?" Scully answered honestly, a little embarrassed.

"Pretty much. But relax! You actually...". The barmaid smiled at her and paused as she turned to face the people who were staring at Scully.

"Seem to be a huge success around here". She completed her findings.

Scully turned her head to face the little audience but quickly turned back to the barmaid. She wasn't comfortable with the situation, and the idea of having several unknown people hitting on her definitely wasn't something that she was looking for tonight.

"So, what can I get you?". The barmaid asked.

"Anything with almost 100% alcohol in it". Scully tried to make her request sound like a joke. Unfortunately, she wasn't joking.

"Oh sweetie, bad day?". The barmaid asked looking sympathetically at Scully.

"Bad life to be honest". Scully answered, sounding miserable. Obviously she was over dramatizing, but she couldn't help herself, not tonight, that was how she was feeling, a whole life time filled with regret.

"Oh..that bad? Let me guess, problems with the 'M' word, am I right?" The barmaid asked fondly, as an attempt to guess the reason of Scully's misery.

"What?" Scully glanced at her confused. The letter 'M' made her spontaneously think of 'Mulder', real evidence that even her thoughts were addicted to him. _"How does she know about Mulder?", _this was the incriminating question that instantly popped into her mind, she didn't even stop to think of what would be a more logical conversation in this situation, it was something that was seriously getting out of her control.

"Men?" The barmaid clarified, killing any of Scully's doubts.

_"Oh good...not Mulder then...", _Scully thought to herself, relieved as she freed herself from her criminal quest. "Yeah", Scully surrendered.

"I know...Such a small word, but such a dangerous one at the same time, right?" In fact, the barmaid sounded much more mature and wise than Scully had thought, she actually underestimated the girl's youth. Scully gave a short laugh, agreeing with the barmaid's point.

"Well...It happens that I have exactly what you need to feel better, at least a little bit. Just hang on a few minutes". With this, she grabbed a small glass and served a generous amount of tequila to Scully.

"Here, have a tequila shot while you're waiting". She reached out her arm offering the tempting drink to Scully.

"Oh...thanks". Scully gently took the little glass and just stared suspiciously at it.

Scully wasn't exactly a huge fan of tequila given her past experiences when she was younger, much younger, though she wouldn't dare to refuse it and without having any other second thoughts, she bravely turned the glass upside down and emptied content down her throat, closing her eyes as she tried to swallow, as quickly as possible, the burning corrosive drink. Anything to stop the pain.

She noticed that the barmaid was still there, staring at her.

"Yay! Good girl! OK, let's make this a double tequila shot". The barmaid said cheerfully while serving her another dose.

Scully obviously didn't refuse it and bravely drank it down even quicker than the first glass. Then she just watched as the barmaid walked away.

It didn't take long before the barmaid was back with a huge and beautiful green drink.

"This is a typical Brazilian drink, named 'Caipirinha'. I know...it's quite hard to say, though it's way easier to drink, trust me!" The barmaid seemed excited to be presenting the drink to Scully.

"It seems pretty good". Scully took the glass, appreciating every single detail of it.

"It actually has Brazilian lemons in it, sugar, lots of ice and most important, vodka."

"Hmm...it's really good!". Just like the barmaid predicted, Scully did enjoy it.

"I knew you would like it! See, my ex-boy is Brazilian and he taught me how to make this amazing drink. You can use pretty much any fruit you want and you can create countless combinations. The traditional one doesn't use vodka, but something like a Brazilian sugar cane brandy or rum, called 'Cachaça' ".

"What happened? Why did you two break up?" Scully was genuinely interested in the girl and her past. She put it down to her own state of mind and was in the mood to indulge in some heartbreak that wasn't her own.

"Well, he had to go back to Brazil...he proposed to me. He wanted me to go with him, but we were way too young to get married. I didn't feel ready for it...I still don't".

"Do you talk to him?"

"Yeah...we're still good friends. Oh! I'm Lauren, by the way!"

"Nice to meet you. I'm Dana".

"What about you? Are you having problems in your relationship?".

"Well, actually, it isn't a relationship. I'm not in a relationship. It's the guy that I work with. We've been working together for six years now, and we trust each other with our lives. We obviously have our differences, but we learned a long time ago how to live with them. We do pretty well actually. Well, most of the time. The truth is that we became best friends, though suddenly things started to degrade. We've been fighting more than ever, and to be honest, we have just had another nasty argument, that's why I'm here. I couldn't go home, I...I'm lost". Scully felt very comfortable to confide in the girl, and the alcohol also encouraged her.

"Oh, that sounds awful. But why exactly do you feel so lost? I mean, it's completely normal to fight with your close friends every once in a while, right? Intimacy can really be a bitch, it...it has side effects, or something. But why does it affect you this much? Have you already asked yourself?" Lauren questioned her, perhaps trying to open Scully's mind. Scully couldn't help but to think how barmaids and bartenders can work as therapists, sometimes they're actually better.

"Why is this fight affecting me so much?...This one was different. This one wasn't like the others...this one was about his ex whatever, who he refuses to see for the she devil that she really is".

"Ex whatever?" Lauren asked clearly confused.

"Yeah, he was partnered with her years ago and I think they became lovers, although I can't say for certain because whenever her name gets brought up he gets so defensive over her and to be perfectly honest, I don't think I want to know what they had together!" It was clear to see that Scully was getting very emotional.

"Ohhh!" Lauren nodded knowingly. She had heard this story so many times in the past, only the names and places were always different.

"And Yes...I've been asking myself about all of this lately, actually and I think that I've been denying myself what I might really feel for him. It scares me, because I reached a point and I don't know if I can live without him anymore, and I don't want to be that kind of girl, I've been avoiding it my whole life. I've never let anyone in, and I've been protecting my heart so damn well, until he came along. I just got lost with him". Alcohol in, truth out...it wouldn't be any other way for Scully.

Scully paused her confession for a moment, trying to swallow the tears that were about to be shed.

"Most of all, I'm scared because I don't know if he feels the same way for me. Apparently not, he made it very clear tonight. And if that's true, I don't think I can take it anymore. I can't...I won't torture myself like this, I don't want more suffering in my life, I've already had plenty". The tears in Scully's voice were obvious to all that were close enough to listen.

Lauren's voice was soft and low but Scully still heard her through the noise of the blaring music.

"Does he know how you feel?"

"I...I don't know. Sometimes I think that's written all over my face, that my feelings are too obvious. But I've never dared to talk about it with him. I don't have the guts, especially when I'm confused like this".

"Yeah, you're totally right. I mean, I don't know much about what you're going through, but if there's one thing that I'm sure of and so far, it has worked for me, when I'm confused, I simply step back, so I can think straight, with no one poisoning my mind. You should take a break, maybe a few weeks off, a vacation maybe? I don't know. When we spend too much time with someone, our feelings may trick us".

Scully smiled sadly at the pretty girl opposite her. "That's exactly what I told him that I would do, except that I was a little more dramatic, I said that I would quit working with him".

"Wow! What did he say?"

"Nothing at all...he just stared at me as I walked away".

Lauren winced at that. "Ouch! But relax, he's probably just a little shocked. Don't go jumping to conclusions honey pie".

Scully sighed dramatically. "Yeah...I know. God! I'm losing my mind!"

"Does he know you're here, if he wants to find you?"

Scully stared at the barmaid and shook her head. "No...no he doesn't know I'm here".

Lauren could see Scully's eyes shining with threatening tears and knew she had to do something and quick. She slapped her hands eagerly against the counter as she prepared to take action. "OK, alcohol, right now. Here, take another tequila shot and I'll be right back with another huge Caipirinha".

"Hey Lauren?"

At the sound of her name, Lauren turned and looked at the heartbroken Scully.

"...Yeah?" She asked gently.

"Make it two?" Scully asked with a sad smile on her lips.

Lauren grinned "Sure thing honey pie! If you're gonna drown your sorrows, might as well drown them quickly, right Dana?"

"I'm actually counting on it...Thank you so much, Lauren". Scully smiled thankfully to the barmaid.

"No problem, Dana...any time".


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note: **It's Mulder's turn now!

Thanks for the reviews!

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><p><strong>Chapter 3<strong>

Meanwhile, at the Gunmen's office...

Mulder stood still as he simply watched Scully, torturing himself with the unbearable sound of her walking away from him, finally realizing how much he hated it, though it was hopelessly too late, she was already gone. As much as he refused to admit it, every time she left, it was like a piece of him was taken with her. Now he felt as if she had taken his whole being, leaving only emptiness.

Even after a few minutes both Mulder and the Gunmen remained frozen, in a sepulchral silence.

Uncomfortable with the awkward situation, Langly dared to break it. "What the hell just happened?"

Mulder seemed to revive himself, taking a long breath as he placed his hands over his face in a gesture of confusion, to say the least, and probably of repentance. "I...I'm not sure". Maybe aware of his actions, his voice was softer now, it seemed that all the anger had given place to something else, perhaps regret.

"Why did you treat her in that way, Mulder?" Frohike, still surprised by his friend's attitude, asked freely.

Judging by his confused expression, it was easy to notice that Mulder was making an effort to simply find his own reasons. As he plunged into the depths of his conscience, he sat on the couch and then looked up to Frohike. "I don't know...I guess I just lost control". That's all he could manage.

Mulder paused, then continued "If...if what I've been told about Cassandra is true, I mean...if she really is the first alien/human hybrid, patient zero, then I'm closer to the truth as never before, as I've never thought I would be actually. Imagine all the conspiracy behind it, the lies to support it, the innocent lives wasted, the dirty work that has been developed behind the scenes for years, decades. This could lead the whole of humanity towards the end, a designed future that doesn't seem too far away". The weakness that moments before lingered in his voice was instantly replaced by his passion for the obscure truth, apparently the only obsession in his life which he believed that was worth living for. Little did he know about the reasons of his existence, much less about his deepest desires.

The Gunmen kept their silence, allowing Mulder to express himself. In fact there was something almost hypnotic in the way Mulder talked about the search for his life's truth, as much as it could sound insane or paranoid. Scully knew that quite well.

Mulder took a long breath as a sign that maybe his next words would be more personal, but no less obsessive.

"Above all things, this...all this could also lead me to the very truth about what happened to my sister". His voice was completely soft again, with a heartbreaking sadness.

Moved by the suffering of their friend, there wasn't anything else that the Gunmen could do besides to listen. Mulder continued.

"I sacrificed my whole life in the name of it, I vowed revenge. I have to put her soul to rest, so I can put mine as well. I would do anything for it, nothing nor no one can hold me down".

"Not even Scully?" Byers gave up on his usual composure and dared to ask.

"I owe the truth to Scully too. Once, I committed myself to her, promising her that I would give her all the answers, the reasons why she was abducted, the people involved and the horrible tests that were underwent, the origin of her neck implant, her cancer. This is another promise that I won't break, I'll go with it until the end, right up to the last consequences, and to do that I have to push her away from me". Mulder said looking straight to Byers.

Then, he lowered his head and finished as he searched for the cell phone in his pocket: "I've brought nothing but suffering to her".

"What are you doing?" Frohike asked staring curiously at Mulder, who seemed to dial something into the phone.

"Calling her." Mulder said firmly. Now his regret was even more evident.

After waiting impatiently for Scully to pick up, he moved the cell phone from his ear and stared confusedly at it. "Strange..."

"What?" Byers asked.

"It rang a few times and then it went mute". It was easy to notice the concern in Mulder's voice.

"Mulder, I hate to state the obvious, but she's probably upset and just turned her phone off. Give her a break, let her digest what just happened". Langly advised.

"Sorry Mulder, but I still don't understand why you had to hurt her like that". Frohike said honestly. It was undeniable that he paid a special kind of attention to Agent Scully, he really didn't make an effort to hide his attraction to her, but above all things he respected her and the way she had always protected Mulder, her loyalty and discrete devotion to him. He couldn't help but to also feel protective towards her.

"To be honest, neither do I. All I know is that I've been very stressed out lately, this Cassandra incident took over me, and I don't know, suddenly I just got extremely angry with Scully for the same reasons as always, for trying to hold my back all the time, for trying to prove me wrong, except this time I overreacted".

"Yes you did. Scully has always been your safe harbour, I can't think of anyone more honest and loyal to you than her. She doesn't keep secrets from you, no matter what. She really didn't deserve that, Mulder". Frohike kept defending Scully.

"I know! You guys have no idea of how sorry I am, how much I regret it". Mulder seemed to shrink more and more on the couch as the Gunmen helped to give him his consciousness back.

"And Mulder, it's not like she's making things up about Diana. We helped her in this investigation. We're just as suspicious of Diana as she is". Usually, Langly was always the quietest one during the Gunmen's fantastic explanations and hardly ever outlined any emotion, but clearly the whole situation was starting to also get to him.

"I know...and I'm really sorry if it looked like I was suspecting you guys, or Scully. You know how much I believe in your work, I always have. Actually...all this doesn't even have anything to do with Diana". Mulder blurted something out that the Gunmen didn't expect to hear.

"What you guys witnessed tonight was a pure demonstration of fear". It looked more like a confession and Mulder chose to keep his face down the whole time.

"I fear that she's right, that I'll keep finding only lies and more suffering".

Before Mulder could say anything else, Langly quickly silenced his upcoming words.

"Mulder, I really don't want to stick my nose into whatever you two have going, but it's pretty clear that Scully's jealous, but her main purpose is only protecting you from all the lies in the world".

Everyone stared in disbelief at Langly.

"That was surprisingly romantic coming from you". Frohike just verbalized everyone's findings.

"Being so fiercely protective of someone is just a shy way of saying to this someone 'I love you' ". Langly added choosing to ignore the comments.

There was a dramatic pause.

"You're right". Mulder could only agree.

He seemed to be lost in his own thoughts, probably managing his next words.

"Do you guys really think that this could be love?" Mulder sounded confused again.

"Well...that's something that you two will have to discover by yourselves, don't you think?" Byers chose to not extend the conversation.

As Byers finished, Mulder rose from the couch and started to move towards the door.

"Where the hell are you going?" Langly asked.

"To take a walk!"

One more step and Mulder was out in the streets.

The cold breeze caressing his face made him instantly breath easier. A small relief on such a sweltering night.

He was hoping that a long walk would calm his thoughts down, perhaps even tame them, at least for a while, though contrary to his expectation, it only increased the noise inside his mind.

As he walked aimlessly, he couldn't help but think of love and its meaning or several meanings, if there is any. More than ever, he was completely aware of his lack of love perception. He was doubtlessly a victim of life, a trapped prey in the piercing jaws of fate, a slave of an unrequited destiny. Every single moment of his life, each decision or next steps were helplessly attached to the memories of his childhood. When at a young age he experienced his first heartbreak, the first unbearable pain that would doom the rest of his existence. The following years were inevitably filled with revealed secrets, exposed lies and shaken trust, however nothing at all had been enough to simply bring the truth to light once and for all much less bring his loss back. Perhaps sanity is an option, though it had never been for him.

The past leaves scars in all human beings, but sometimes they just don't seem to heal, on the contrary, they become deeper and more painful until they are turned into desperation, a blind obsesion. When you don't have much at stake there's no need to be so strict, so careful. He had never minded before about losing to love, not until she came into his life disguised as a harmless work partner. It turned out that she was much more than this, she was everything to him.

Subconsciously, he was used to facing love just like an x file, an unsolved mystery where the pieces of the puzzle never seemed to fit, a strange creature in eternal metamorphosis, changing shape to camouflage its real intentions. For him, love had always meant suffering, an agonizing feeling intrinsically linked to pain. Though not even aware of it, he craved for love, for someone who he could love and simply be loved in return, someone who could be the element of his salvation, the deliverance from every sin and guilt, a bit of human warmth to his cold loneliness. Consciously, he knew that Scully was this someone. She was his redemption.

Even though he regretted his sharp spoken words, the unspoken ones had a greater weight. The things left unsaid were perhaps crushing them both everyday, deteriorating their bond with time. It is true that words can mend broken things, but sometimes the silence only helps to complete the shattering. And that was exactly how he felt, he had never been the kind of person who regretted his own actions, no matter their consequences, but right now he was sorry for the undone things, the untaken actions, the un-managed words and the un-shared feelings. More than this, he feared that his silence, or their silence had finally tore them apart, in a unfixable way. After all, 'to read between the lines' might be useful for books, though for real human relationships it is a terribly unhealthy habit.

He noticed now his thoughts, even though still not quiet, were perhaps more organized and converging only for her.

He didn't notice anything or anyone at all around him. The cold and the darkness were not disturbing him a bit. Now he was being taken by memories, not the hurtful ones, but the delightful and warm ones. In this invited flashback he could clearly see all their precious moments and he could feel every shared touch, accidentally or purposely. His heart instantly rejoiced thinking of her and at the same time it shattered with the idea of no longer having her near.

Mesmerized by his thoughts, he continued his walk with his head down. He could barely feel his feet on the ground, it seemed that the hypnosis was also accompanied by levitation.

That was when he came upon a flashing red light reflected in a puddle that he immediately slowed down his steps. For someone used to the darkness, any unusual light would always draw his attention. Maybe it wasn't the light itself that made him stop and raise his head, maybe it was the written word: 'Hades'. He knew the meaning and somehow, he immediately related to it. He himself had always felt as an already condemned soul, and stepping into the apparent little hell would be just an irremediable consequence. Then, without any further thoughts, he dared to cross into the dark welcoming corridor that would probably take him to his undeniable destiny, or at least, to the bowels of the mysterious place.

The long and narrow darkness didn't impress him, after all he was lost inside his own thoughts, guided only by simple and pure curiosity, one of his greatest defects and qualities at the same time.

Then, he found himself in a hall of mirrors, completely empty of people or furniture. Moving from one environment where the darkness seemed to prevail to another where the light wasn't a matter of choice made his eyes immediately feel the contrast, but not only this, he also allowed himself to think about its purpose, linking it to the very meaning of 'Hades'. As he walked towards the door on the opposite side he couldn't help but think about the vast possibilities of what that place could actually be.

After crossing the door he felt relieved, and perhaps a little disappointed, at his finding, the place was just a bar with some aspects of a nightclub. Having an insider's view of the place activated even further the gears of his mind. At first he stared at the ceiling, and even under low light he was able to notice its painting, blue sky with white clouds. Then, looking down, the red walls, the darker environment and several human figures that seemed to overlap, were enough to complete his second finding. Now the concept of 'Hades' was clearer than ever, the place was designed to provide a simulation of death. The corridor was the dark passage towards the underworld, the hall of mirrors could mean the "bright light" that some people seem to report after a near death experience, where you might realize the end of your material existence, and finally, the place where your soul is supposed to rest according to your actions during the past life. He couldn't help but admire the designer, it was indeed a very clever idea.

Even as he looked thoroughly around the place, the darkness and the crowd spread to all corners wouldn't let him see the redheaded figure that he craved for, after all she was the most unlikely person that he would expect to meet here. She surely wasn't damned like him. Hopefully, she would be at home, fast asleep in bed, safe and completely unaware that this place even existed. The bowels of hell wouldn't hold such a perfect soul as hers. She would certainly be an angel, not a fallen one, she belonged to the light.

He, though, already felt like he belonged to the world of the damned and spontaneously took the left set of stairs towards the bar counter. Usually, he would choose any crummy bar to drown his sorrows, but his attraction and curiosity about the place were just too overwhelming.

His outfit, jeans and black leather jacket, seemed to match the place so that his age difference compared to the others wasn't very contrasting, not that he cared about people's opinions, his self-esteem was as resilient as his obsession. Yet, his presence seemed to draw stares.

Ignoring the ones around him, he finally reached the counter, and chose the less crowded area, where a single available stool seemed to be waiting for him.

As soon as he sat, one of the bartenders approached him, a young man in his 20's with several tattoos on both arms and to Mulder's surprise, wearing black eyeliner.

"What can I get you?" The bartender said directly, maybe noticing the questioning stare from Mulder.

"Uh...a shot of Jack, please". Mulder realized his impolite attitude and looked away as he made his request.

The bartender just nodded and before he could leave, Mulder quickly added "No...make it double".

Perfectly aware of his actions, omissions and sins, he gave his soul to the hell he was living, allowing it to burn, once again surrendering to his torment.


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's note:** Sorry that it took a while, but here's chapter 4! Thanks for all your lovely reviews!

Lauren, my little Beta mermaid, as I said, I won't break my promise, I'll just postpone it!

; )

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><p><strong>Chapter 4<strong>

Meanwhile at the counter on the right side...

Scully seemed distracted, concentrating on picking out the last bits of strawberry from her glass and then, playing orally with the black straw, an innocent action from her point of view but one which automatically drew the interest of a young man who was sat next to her.

As she turned to face the one who was disturbing her with his incessant staring, Scully realized the probable meaning of her innocence and quickly looked away, resting the black straw in the glass again.

Thankfully, Lauren was back again strategically hitting the refreshing new glass of Caipirinha against the bar top to ward off the unwanted stares.

"So...Dana, tell me...what's this partnership job that you have with...with the 'M' word?" She felt comfortable enough to restart the conversation with Scully, mainly for the purpose of entertaining her and even, slightly, to relieve her heartbreak.

"It really is a 'M' word too. His name is Mulder, actually that's his surname. His name is Fox...Fox Mulder, but no one calls him by the first name". Scully also felt comfortable to share a little bit of her life with the girl, which definitely wasn't an usual habit for her. In fact, her life could seem sometimes as airtight as her heart.

"Yeah...for obvious reasons, right?". Undeniably, Lauren was a spirited girl. She couldn't hide her strong personality, her sense of humour, even when it was sharp enough to hurt, and she wasn't exactly the kind of person who could repress a spontaneous laugh. She had the amazing ability of using all her wisdom of living not only to her own benefit, but it also seemed to have a great positive effect on other people. Scully had noticed this since the beginning of their chat, and couldn't help but laugh at her last comment.

"Oh...Me and my big mouth! So Sorry, Dana! I made you think of him!" Lauren said apologetically, placing her right hand in her mouth, as a cute attempt of silencing her own words. Chatter was another striking feature of her personality, though not in an inconvenient way, on the contrary, it was very amusing.

"As if I could forget him. Don't get me wrong, Lauren, you're being a great help to me tonight, a really unexpected friend when I feel more lonely than ever, but I just can't stop thinking of him, it's beyond my ability...beyond myself control to be honest. So...don't be sorry! Except for the fact tat you're turning me into this Caipirinha junkie!" By sharing her feelings without any obvious effort, Scully could at least find a little humour in her own tragedy, which helplessly tore a smile from Lauren. Clearly, Scully was a victim of alcoholic dis-inhibition, very common in all kinds of human beings, and extremely liberating indeed.

"Anyway...we work for the FBI. We're special agents". Scully easily answered what she had been asked a few minutes earlier.

"Oh...My...God! FBI? Just like Clarice Starling? I'm crazy about "_Hannibal"_, it's pretty much my favourite film ever!". Lauren's eyes sparkled in excitement.

In point of fact, a FBI career seemed to arouse most people's curiosity, but the girl's reaction could be compared to a little girl opening an unexpected present on Christmas morning. Such a lovely scene, and Scully found it amazing to finally see someone draw much passion and interest in something.

"Yeah...something like that. You would be amazed to see how many Hannibal's are in this and other worlds. Trust me, sometimes this work isn't as exciting as it sounds". Unfortunately, Scully didn't have the same fresh excitement as Lauren after so many ups and downs, actually more downs than ups, during her FBI career. It broke her heart even more to disappoint the girl like this, but the truth must always be said.

"What do you mean...other worlds?" When Lauren asked curiously, Scully finally realized how much she had over shared.

"Huh...nothing. It's just that sometimes cruelty doesn't seem human". To talk openly about the true essence of her work at the FBI wasn't exactly in her plans, and Scully really wasn't yet at the alcoholic level that would allow her to be so open about the x files and let her get away with it, so she quickly managed a plausible answer.

Lauren chose not to push, respecting Scully's discretion.

"Seriously Lauren, my life is not that interesting. But tell me about you, you're not American, are you?" Scully asked, breaking the ice.

"Yes, you're right! I'm not. Made in the UK, born and raised! ". Lauren proudly answered.

"I knew it! You have a beautiful accent". Scully said lively after taking a long sip from her drink.

"Thank you!" Lauren was doubtlessly flattered, though chose to add: "But I try to manage it every once in a while, play down the "Englishness" of my accent, or at least every time I remember, so people won't give me funny looks".

"Well you shouldn't! So...how did you end up here in Washington? I mean, you're very far away from home". Scully kept her interest alive.

"Yes, I am. Well...I'm studying to be a dentist. I got this great scholarship, once in a lifetime opportunity and decided to go for it. I also wanted to experience different things, see the world as it is and by doing so...find my own truth".

"That's so wise, Lauren! I'm pretty sure you'll be a fantastic dentist. Well, you'll certainly be responsible for hundreds, thousands of smiles, including mine". Lauren's bright enthusiasm was inspiring, and Scully couldn't help but encourage her.

Lauren smiled happily and then looked down to Scully's glass.

"But first, let's concentrate holding onto your smile! I can see that you already finished your Caipirinha! Hold on...I'm going to get you another. Which flavour, milady?" Lauren asked playfully.

"Lemon, if you please, miss". Scully joined her, using her own perfectly put on English accent, to imitate the English aristocracy.

"Your wish is my command! Just let me get some more lemons from the other counter".

"Wow...did I use up all lemons over here?" Scully asked in shock.

"It's cool, tonight you're allowed to".

Meanwhile at the counter on the left side...

Lauren made her way through the crowd spread out on the dance floor so she could reach the other counter.

She carelessly arranged herself a tiny space between the people crammed in around her, in the nearby surroundings. Standing on her tiptoes in a very girly way, she leaned on the counter, resting her elbows on it.

"Help me Johnny boy, I need more lemons!" Almost instantaneously to her movement, she made her request to the bartender near her, announcing her presence as she sympathetically yelled at him due to the loud maddening song that was playing.

"How come? It's not even Saturday". The young bartender asked surprised.

"Well...apparently today seems to be the national day for drowning sorrows or something". She said while staring at several empty glasses that were resting on the counter.

"Tell me about it!" He only agreed with Lauren's comment and finished serving another dose of whiskey to a man who seemed to be miles away in his own thoughts so he wouldn't be listening to or caring about anything going on around him.

"Hold on, ginger girl, let me just finish here". The bartender collected the incriminating empty glasses that belonged to the miserable man, and after hearing a sympathetic "Thank you" from Lauren, he took off to accomplish his task.

Just like all corny pitfalls of destiny, perfectly plotted by the Universe, Lauren would never have imagined that the mysterious miserable man happened to be Mulder, the 'M' word responsible for the misery of the woman that she had just met on the other counter, Dana, to whom she was therapeutically intoxicating with Caipirinhas.

Intrigued, and even a little bit disturbed by the emanating sadness from the man, Lauren gently moved her body away from the counter and dared to ask her standard question when witnessing alcoholic escapism.

"Bad day?"

Mulder took a while to return from his lobotomized state though chose not to ignore the young lady, but, still without facing her, answered her question with two honestly spoken little words: "Bad life".

Those two words, however, sparked something, another touch of destiny? As Lauren realized that she had already heard the same depressing short answer earlier tonight.

"Funny..." She sounded thoughtful.

"What? Self-indulgence?" Still avoiding eye contact with her, he asked sarcastically, joking about his own misery.

"No!" Lauren denied, letting a small laugh escape her mouth given Mulder's ability to make fun of himself in such a condition.

In fact, her heartfelt laughter grabbed Mulder's attention so he immediately turned his face to finally look at the lady who genuinely showed interest in his suffering. He couldn't help but be surprised by the girl's look, who he hadn't expected to be so relatively young. All he could see was a fresh face, designed with perfect features, a lovely redheaded creature who oddly reminded him of the only person he could love more than life itself , a face that seemed to hide under the dark makeup all the light that it could reflect, an angelic face definitely not made for sin.

"It...it's just that there's a woman on the other counter who just said the exact same thing to me". Perhaps puzzled by the way he was staring at her, Lauren found it difficult to formulate her words, but went steady until she finished her statement. Now she was able to completely see the stranger's face, strong male traits which were surprisingly matched with small sad hazel eyes, a very handsome stranger indeed.

"It's amazing how people can feel miserable these days, right?" Since it seemed to entertain the girl, Mulder kept his sharp sarcasm, but obviously without being impolite or rude to her. However, he noticed that this time she didn't pay attention to his sense of humour, she seemed to be looking for something or someone in the middle of the crowd.

"There...it's that redhead. Dana is her name"

Her words had the same effect as a magic spell. Somehow, the words 'redhead' and 'Dana' together in the same phrase meant much more than just a weird coincidence. Actually he refused to believe in such a thing as a coincidence, for him life was just a sequence of pre-determined events, and human beings were only victims of destiny. Taken by the spell, he turned his whole body to look for his own destiny. Blame it on the alcohol, or love intoxication, but he could swear that in that very moment everything and everyone seemed to be moving in slow motion. The maddening noise became a delightful silence that could only be found in heaven, the dark ocean of lost souls that was moving in aggressive human shaped waves suddenly seemed to be divided in two parts, leading the way for his heart's and soul's freedom. He had a glazed look on his face, and right there on the other side, he could already see Scully, even amongst the darkness, her personal glowing light stood out, in the most divine way.

He gently touched Lauren's arm as a sign of his gratefulness, who now was aware of the whole situation, and started his personal Exodus towards his promised land.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's note: **Greetings, Lovely Earthlings! Well, assuming that some of you have found this story relatively interesting to be read, I know that some might be thinking that I probably don't know the meaning of the word "soon". Assuming as well that some of you actually care, my deepest apologies, and in my defense, I was on vacation, travelling, and then I got back to work, getting ridiculously busy. But I'm back now, and here's a brand new, and the last, chapter!

A very special 'thank you' to my fabulous and patient beta, XFoxMuldersGirlsX! Love you more, Lauren!

**Warning:** There's sex in this chapter! No porn or anything, nothing that most of you have not seen, or done, but I'm supposed to warn, right? I don't really want to be responsible for corrupting kinds or teenagers, the world is already in charge of this job.

Hope you all enjoy it!

Feedback? Please?

; )

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><p><strong><span>Chapter 5<span>**

"Scully?" Mulder asked with a sense of glorious relief but at the same time, a poisoning doubt pierced his thoughts. As he spoke, he simultaneously placed his right hand on her back. Touching her wasn't necessarily an option, though it was essentially the only tangible way to find out if he wasn't just another deluded ungodly being wandering in the despair of the underworld, an esoterically mythical place where, specific religious concepts aside, the loveliest dreams and smallest pleasurable desires are precisely the most humanly unattainable ones and which are purposely exposed as hallucinations in order to torture damned souls who neglected all their given second chances, even if sometimes implicit, when they were still in reach. If paradise is the place in which transcendental existence is harmonious and peaceful, where there's only overflowing divine goodness and happiness, in the most genuine form of the word, hell is its undeniable antonym, its antithesis, the natural habitat of the seven deadly sins and all suffering inflicted by them, with the exception that repentance can no longer be heard, much less consented. Touching her meant touching the truth, evidence concrete enough to clearly distinguish reality from illusion or from a mere alcoholic hallucination staged by his entrenched desires.

Only his presence was able to create an invisible force, capable of attracting or repelling anything else in their surroundings, and which became more and more intense as the distance between them shortened until his hand finally met her skin, causing Scully's senses to spontaneously awake, sharpening them indeed. A phenomenon that could even be compared to the very concept of magnetism, in which two magnetic objects are attracted by their opposite poles, north and south inherently connected, their magnetic fields in a perfect communion. Scientific comparisons aside, and focusing on the romantic side of it, it was like her own ears recognized the voice calling her name and as if her own skin, even though covered with clothes, recognized the magnetic touch of his hands, as if her whole body, bones, flesh, and even the long avenues of veins pulsing warm blood were simply revived after the void left by his absence. And as a sudden reflection imposed by her auditory and sensitive memory, Scully quickly turned to face the origin of such invisible attraction.

"Mulder?" She asked frowning through a failed voice, almost suffocating, astonished and breathless, as if the air had been completely removed in the instant Mulder walked in.

They stared at each other for a few seconds, overwhelmed by the unlikely coincidence of their meeting, except that there's no such thing as coincidence. In fact, unconsciously, both had conjured each other's presence, silently repeating each other's names as an unusual mantra, driven by remorse, suffering or simply by primitive desire. After all, the magnetic power of our minds is no secret at all, though since human beings are a bunch of naked creatures leading each other blindly, we are still ashamed of our purest instincts and blinded by earthly distractions, so ignorance numbs us, depriving ourselves access to the most beautiful details, and perhaps to the most noticeable ones, of being so complexly human.

Timelessly, both remained static, plunging carelessly into the depths of each other's eyes, which, especially for them, meant looking directly into the depths of each other's bared souls. Such a unique recognition mechanism that has been acquired by them after many years working together, side by side. A mechanism that neither the highest technology of fingerprint nor eyeball scanning would be able to perform so accurately.

"How...how did you find me?" Her words tripped, inebriated by all the ingested alcohol and helpless, by Mulder's addictive presence, like the unbalanced steps of a drunkard. Without reflecting on the seemingly pretentious question that was casually formulated by her mind, Scully dared to ask deliberately, still never diverting her eyes from his nor striving to hide her perplexity. She found very difficult to exactly define her emotional state. An exotic composition of feelings and sensations in abnormal dosages that even the most elaborate cocktail of drugs would never be able to achieve the same effect. She felt, indeed, an undeniable joy to see him, but unlike Mulder, she couldn't feel any sense of relief, much less a glorious one, especially because she couldn't help but to feel trapped by an uncontrollable feeling that grew inside her, the one that proved she was most definitely secretly devoted to him. She could also still feel a hint of bitterness, reminiscent of their sulphuric argument, and resentment is commonly accompanied by sorrow.

"I...I wasn't" His caution in answering showed an evident fear of being unkindly honest to her.

"You wasn't looking for me" Realizing his forethought in repressing his words, Scully disappointingly finished his statement.

"No! I was...I was. I tried to call you, Scully" Remorseful for the erroneously short words mentioned seconds ago, he wisely and wholeheartedly, rearranged his reasoning.

"I know you did". She answered while looking away from him, lowering her conformed eyes to her now empty glass as she started to sadly play once again with the black straw.

"It's broken" Answering in a few cold words, and without returning her gaze to him, she held the glass and quickly drove it towards her mouth, trying to swallow the rest of the nearly zero content.

Even choosing to ignore his stare, she could feel his eyes penetrating her like lasers in a questioning way, intrigued by her attitude and probably wondering about what could be actually broken. Was she being blatantly obvious and was meaning "my phone is broken" or was she choosing to be cryptic about the state of their relationship? Did she mean "we are broken beyond repair"?

"My phone" She kept her words simple and direct, almost monosyllabic.

"How? What happened?" Now _he_ frowned in a sign of disorientation.

He observed her as she slowly turned to face him again. He could see that she seemed to have something inside her mouth, slipping playfully from one side to another within her mucous membrane, perhaps some left component of the liquid voraciously consumed. More than ever her lovely lips, glowing wet and slightly reddish, delicately moving without any purpose, had an almost erotic effect on him, fostering even more his lustful wills chemically supported by the aphrodisiac effect of ethanol .

"Well...see, this is what happens when you're not careful with things" She continued, bravely deciding to look into his eyes again. Mulder knew that under the pretence of talking about her phone she was talking about them.

There was a reticent pause, though her following words wouldn't be hesitant at all.

"They can break" She said firmly, crushing a small piece of ice between her teeth, with a meaningful and honest attitude that hit him so directly, but at the same time and contradictorily, only increased his oral fixation on her.

Seeing her free from every shame and strict control imposed by professional issues, actually imposed by her own fears and insecurities, was like contemplating a surrealistic artwork, with all its thoroughly unexpected details, a philosophical expression, a revolutionary liberation. The way she exposed her words or performed her unplanned actions was almost threatening, though still with a remarkable hint of fragility, fatally linked to the suffering he had caused her. Even under a smothering regret, he couldn't help but admire her, not as an impersonal artwork itself, though as an incredibly attractive woman. Her red hair, surprisingly shiny under such minimal incidental spot lights from the counter's ceiling, radiant as the flames of hell, ironically matching with her heavenly blue eyes and with her gleaming golden cross, at the sight of which he felt strongly inclined to fall to his knees as a sign of redemption. Her posture was completely relaxed, carefree, with a few undone buttons of her shirt inadvertently revealing an abyss into which he would easily throw himself. Even her politely and femininely crossed legs seemed tempting enough to not be resisted.

Scully immediately noticed the change in the way Mulder stared at her, and as any hot blooded woman, she knew the exact meaning of it. Furtively, she was flattered, making an effort to hide her reciprocal excitement before his respectfully perverted eyes, momentarily forgetting the grudge she felt.

Mulder decided to leave behind possible questions about the incoherence of their presence, or about the inconsistency of their own unrehearsed performances. Uncomfortable with the hot distant silence between them, and willing to fix their broken promises, he steadily grabbed Scully's left arm, moving even closer to her body, definitely unconcerned about prying eyes.

Stunned, and unabashedly aroused by his almost aggressive approach, Scully's automatic reaction was to half spin the stool where she was sitting in order to strategically position her body in front of his body, as an extremely welcoming attitude to listen to him properly, seductively uncrossing her legs, accidentally bumping into his legs.

Mulder, undeniably nervous with her seductively inviting behaviour, tightened his grip a little bit more around her delicate arm, reaching down towards her face, purposely close to her ears, as he spoke: "Scully...I...I need to talk to you".

Indomitably, the proximity of his lips to her ears caused her chills, however she expected much more elaborate words than the ones that had been pronounced. Naively, she dreamed of heartfelt words, almost poetic, but spontaneously said, that would mean a restorative repentance, the kind that only love can rebuild.

Mulder gently released her arm and calmly returned to his position, looking even more deeply into her eyes, expecting an answer.

Scully decidedly got up from the stool, still standing a few inches away from his face, even wearing higher heels than usual. She leaned closely towards his chest, standing on tiptoes so she could relatively easily reach his left ear, and delicately resting her both hands on his both arms, ensuring herself decent support.

"Mulder...I need to...pee". She said in a sarcastically seductive tone, though physiologically honest, she was being borderline childish by mocking his noble intentions.

The strangeness of the moment was fortunately disturbed by a familiar noise, causing them both to look immediately to the source.

"Oh..hell! Sorry! I told you that I was incredibly clumsy, Dana". Lauren was back, with a brand new deliciously fresh caipirinha which she nearly spilled over the counter.

"So sorry...Am I interrupting something?" She asked worriedly, looking at them both, and realizing that there was some kind of awkward situation going on.

"Not at all! Especially because_ this_ something can not be more disturbed than it already is". She answered friendly to the girl, but bitterly referring to the imprecise nature of her relationship with Mulder.

"Scully?" Mulder called her name and touched her arm once again but this time as an attempt to tame the return of her acidic behaviour.

Lauren felt uncomfortable and embarrassed, but sympathetically handed the drink to Scully.

"Thank you, Lauren" Scully was receptive to the drink, affectively returning the care and attention directed to her by the girl.

Lauren gave a wide open smile and then looked bewilderedly at Mulder.

Ignoring Mulder's attempt, Scully wildly swallowed the whole liquid content from the glass, at an alarming speed.

"Wow...Easy girl! I know that I encouraged you to drown your sorrows, but let's definitely not make this the cause of death! I would never be able to forgive myself" Lauren warned, never quitting her sense of humour.

"Scully?" Mulder's calling became more insistent, and so did her disregard in answering it. Sadistically, Scully seemed to enjoy keeping him at this point in his madness.

"Lauren...where's the toilet?"

"Can you see that corridor next to the DJ?"

"Yes" Scully answered after turning to face it.

"You can find plenty of them there".

"Right...thank you".

At this, she unhesitatingly started to make her way through the crowd.

Abandoned in the vacuum left by her absence, Mulder quickly picked Scully's blazer from the floor after realizing that she had carelessly dropped it when getting up, and impulsively started to follow her.

Virtually without any adversity in crossing the overflowing sea of creatures moving almost atomically close to each other, Scully finally reached her destination without even expecting or realizing that Mulder was following her, intentionally stalking her, however, due to his height and full-bodied structure, he certainly didn't have the same agility as her, a finding that could be explained by the anatomical structure of her tiny body, perfectly aerodynamic for an unfair escape.

Scully found herself standing again in a shrunken corridor, definitely not narrower than the one at the entrance, but equivalently long, perhaps a little bit longer, under the same darkness, with lights enough to only reveal the frame of several doors, four positioned on each side of the corridor, and one on her opposite side.

Somehow, the corridor brought childhood memories to Scully, who childishly felt like Alice at the gateway to Wonderland, standing in a place that bordered on the surreal, except instead of a single little door, there were several ones thankfully compatible to her size, something that wouldn't be difficult at all, and available to be chosen. And instead of "Wonderland" itself, behind these doors, she could only find unimpressive bathrooms of a place that basically meant hell. Her freely flowing drunken thoughts dared to even adapt to the title "Scully's Adventures in Hell", she half smiled at such comparison. However, as opposed to her low expectations, wonders could be found behind one of these doors indeed, it was just a matter of whether to allow the free fall, right down the rabbit hole.

Leaving the nonsense behind, she consciously noticed that she wasn't completely alone in the hallway, there were a few human figures that seemed to merge together, leaning against a door or another, sinfully enough to be compared to ludic characters from a lovely novel, however, perhaps anthropomorphic at the same level. Even so, a character from her real life, a _Mad_ _Hatter_, actually devoid of hat, though completely off his head, and certainly just as much known for his undeniable madness, was coming after her, sentenced to metaphorical decapitation for murdering a time that wouldn't return, but willing to fight against his own disasters.

Without any further realistic perceptions, nor fanciful ones, Scully started to try each one of the knobs available, until she found the first door that invitingly opened to her.

Her first step, still somewhat cautious, into the unlikely toilet was almost simultaneously followed by an unexpected approach. Mulder finally reached her, steadily pushing her into the bathroom and locking the door behind them.

As a sign of self defence against a sudden attack, Scully readily turned to face the possible aggressor, automatically running her right hand through her back searching for her gun, desperately noticing that it wasn't there, not even the empty holster.

Still under the effect of an incredibly increased heart rate and tightened muscles, she felt a strange relief in realizing that the person responsible for such adrenaline rush was, as usual, Mulder.

She gave a few more steps back inside the cubicle, trying to ensure herself a safe distance from him.

"Jesus, Mulder! What the hell are you doing?" Scully said through an accelerated breathing.

"I'm sorry, Scully. I really need to talk to you". He answered apologetically, walking a couple of steps towards her, which concurrently caused her to move once again from him, this time towards the sink.

For him, it was nearly impossible to take his eyes from her, though he momentarily managed it to take a fast look around. It was an unlikely toilet indeed, a cubicle, perhaps comfortable for one person, but relavely small enough for two. The walls and the ceiling were entirely made of mirrors, which seemed to be sort of a lab version from the mirrored room in the entrance, however just as much disturbing. The floor and the sink were both made of black granite, and the toilet bowl, shiny black porcelain, which, in combination with the mirrors, consisted a sophisticated atmosphere, seeming to have been strategically chosen to hide the dirty little secrets of people, literally and metaphorically.

"Couldn't you just wait?" The sound of her voice drew his attention back, causing him to move towards her once again, even though she was fearing his unwelcome presence.

"No, I couldn't". He was standing right behind Scully, as he contemplated their current situation, watching as she leaned over the sink, washing her face delicately. He watched mesmerized at her attempt to cool off after the shock he caused. Her every movement seemed to be carefully done in slow motion, just as each drop of water was seductively trickling down her neck.

After a few more seconds, she stood up, trying to dry the remaining water droplets, and _through the looking glass_, she finally dared to meet his eyes. Then, contrary to his expectations, she turned to face him directly.

"All right, Mulder". Defeated by his almost pleading, she finally consented to let him speak.

Abusing the provided space, Mulder boldly approached her even further, placing his hands on her delicate face.

"Please forgive me, Scully" He said meaningfully looking inside her blueness.

"No" She said harshly while getting rid of his touch, but desiring the very opposite.

"_You_ forgive me, Mulder".

Confused as if someone had given him a hopeless riddle as absurd as the similarity between a raven and a writing desk, Mulder kept silent.

"You were right, I'm taking this personally, Mulder". She said walking backwards until she met the sink again.

Her words were so bitter and honest, that completely took away from him any possible questioning he had, but at the same time only sharpened his desire of knowing her more deeply.

"No, Scu...". Mulder tried to cut, but Scully kept him in his place and made her statement.

"Because it is personal for me". She fearlessly looked into his eyes.

"Ever since I've known myself I've been struggling to find my place in this damn world, a place where I can completely fit in, where I can understand myself, somewhere I can belong. First, the Physics, then, Med School, and finally, the FBI, against my parents will. But you see, the FBI was particularly different. I know I've never said this to you, but during our very first case together I saw something in you, something that somehow sparked something in me, something that was missing in me".

Scully's overwhelming honesty only strengthened Mulder's silence, who now was just an obedient spectator.

"I must say that your madness was very persuasive, actually it still is". At this point, a fragile smile escaped from her mouth just as easily as the outpouring of words that were being released.

"But it wasn't in vain, it wasn't for your own selfish reasons, it had a major purpose. And right there in that Oregon motel room, that night, when you were telling me about your sister, about your life's search, trusting a, until then, stranger with something so intimate, somehow I found my own path, perhaps not the one that I was supposed to follow, but the one that I freely chose for myself. At the very moment, I simply knew that you would never wear any masks with me".

"And after everything that happened to me, my sister's death, my abduction, it became my life's search as well. Just as much yours as mine. I can only say _ours_."

"What I'm trying to say is that your passion has been my real inspiration for the past however many years, no matter the personal costs. And I want you to know that since the moment that we met, it never crossed my mind, not even for one brief second, to debunk your work, Mulder...never. And, contrary to what you may think, it doesn't excite me proving you wrong. Our points of view are different indeed, mostly opposites, but how many times our personal beliefs or knowledge saved one another? Countless times, Mulder. And I dare to think that we only resisted all these years because we're surprisingly alike".

"And even through several harsh and painful moments, we always had each other. Our friendship is our resistance, Mulder".

"But at the same time that your blind passion fascinates me, motivates me like nothing else, it also worries me. I know your steps, I actually follow your every step, and I feel that we're spinning around in circles, endlessly, until we get dizzy, and this is weakening us, gradually separating us from each other".

"And I can't watch it, I won't allow it, Mulder. We went too far away and for nothing".

"We're moving increasingly away from the world, from life, solitarily drowning in a sea of lies, exhaustively losing over and over again".

"Are you really willing to sacrifice your whole existence for an ideal?"

"Do you really want to fear life more than death?"

"What do you really want, Mulder...To find the truth or to just get something from it?"

"Right now? Right now, Scully...I want you". With this he steadily walked towards her, leaving no chance at all for a escape, trapping her indeed, as he held her face with his both hands again, this time a little harder, and greedily pressed his lips on hers, finally exorcising himself from a confined desire.

Unconcerned whether he was invited or not, his attack was accurate and compelling enough to be stopped, thoroughly performed as a premeditated crime, and even though she was effortlessly resistant at the beginning, her redemption could no longer be avoided, as well as the pit of hell.

Out of sight to the world, within the ambiguous intimate privacy of a single toilet stall, they allowed themselves to seal their lips together, sealing a veiled commitment, long envisioned by both, though strictly repressed by blind cowardice.

For Mulder, her wilful reciprocity was particularly arousing. What once were selfish reveries manufactured by his male perversions, and by his own secret feelings that he masochistically harboured for her, now were uncontrollably exceeding physical barriers. For Scully, his unrestrained desires towards her were provocatively stimulating. For them both, their mutual correspondence did not seem caused by a mere external agent, even though ethanol was in fact a catalyst, but it couldn't be simply reduced to something as shallow: a swallowed feeling, an ingested desire. Lust, though present, was not the responsible emotion, especially because to them there is a major distinction between inconsequent lust and sacred love. It meant something greater. _They_ meant something much greater.

Their mouths, exhausted by the incessant kisses, they suddenly felt the urge to deeper their intimacy. Mulder unashamedly ran his lips down her neck and his bit of stubble rubbing against her sensitive silk skin tore out her first choked moan, and then, in response to the audible pleasure, he deliberately dared to tear at her shirt, almost ripping it, causing some buttons to jump. Then, that wild, rather forceful act encouraged him to slid his hands down her sinuous body, allowing himself to explore new territories that once were maddeningly prohibited.

Scully flushed girlishly at physically feeling his arousal as he further pressed his body against hers, but at the same time, it only increased her urgency for him, and now she allowed herself to place invasive kisses on his intoxicating cologne-scented neck.

The heat that emanated from their own bodies and their own smothered breaths were able not only to evaporate all the alcohol consumed, becoming further more aware of their actions, but also to blur the mirrors of the cubicle.

Mulder slightly bent down, simultaneously running his hands up to the height of Scully's thighs, and then, slowly, as if afraid to rush his actions, lifted her skirt up, revealing much more than an intimacy he longed to appreciate, but a piece of clothing that devastatingly instigated him. Her black stockings weren't ordinary pantyhose, they were temptingly held by a black garter belt, and although practically hypnotized by it, he quickly loosened it. To take off her panties and caressly throwing them somewhere in the near distance it was just a logical consequence of the half-strip, as well as his following set of actions. Mulder roughly lifted her by the hips, and pushed her up onto the black granite sink. Scully teasingly pulled him even closer to her now opened legs, opening the buttons of his jeans. He pulled her in and nothing else mattered. Time could no longer be accounted for in seconds nor minutes, but in hurried heart beats, moving forward in the dead of night.

In spite of their sudden and frenzied need for one another, in each other's embrace now slow moving and gentle embrace, under the pleasurable cloud of dizziness, they found the only truth inside.

If sex can be roughly summarized as "in and out", to them it meant healing, it was redemption itself, absolution, and now they could step out of the hell they were living it.

Love would be their resistance.

**THE END**


End file.
